Nicolas Sarkozy (president of France): So what did the British do for us anyway? Serge Poniatowski (Blatherskite's chief celebrity interviewer): Invaded Normandy on D-Day with ze Americans and Canadians Nic: Well a few of them did I admit, but what did that Monty do? Sat on the beach brewing le tea when 'e should 'ave been taking Caen Serge: OK, but why didn't you invite the Queen to the anniversary? Nic: Oh I can't be bothered with 'er, it's always such a performance. You 'ave to let the Palace know a year in advance so they can make les arrangements. As it is we're going to get Gordon Brown 'oo will just lecture us on le economy and try to monopolize Obama Serge: Oui Nic: I think I'll invite Tony Blair just to annoy 'im Serge: Isn't this all a bit petty Nic Nic: C'est le politics mon brave. I need a result 'ere to stop the papers laughing at me when they print more pictures of Carla. It's driving me up ze wall Serge: Wait till the videos come out Nic: Videos, videos! There aren't any videos. Are there? Serge: So they say Nic: Of me and 'er? Serge: I didn't know about those Nic Nic: Er, well you don't. You mind 'ow you go Serge, we are not amused